perfect

At 2:00 this morning, May 21, 2009, at the age of 96 years old... he took his last breaths. He had his birthdays on the 19th and when mom went to check on him at CMH this morning he was not responsive. She told me while we were meeting for Danielle's birthday dinner that he was going to die probably that night or the next day. So after the dinner we drove into Bolivar and sat with him all night. Peggy, Patty, my mom and me sat around him and talked to him... holding his had and telling him that we loved him.

I curled up in a chair listening to his soft breaths to nap for a little while, Peggy and Patty started to follow suit. My mom and grandpa sat together, until she noticed his breaths were slowing. Then she crawled into the bed with him and wrapped him in a hug, telling him that it was going to be ok and that he made her life wonderful. Then she called for Patty to go get a nurse because she thought he was dying. I woke up and came to his side too as he took his final breaths. I told him it was going to be ok and that we loved him very much. He inhaled, and that was it.

There was no noise.
No movement.
No pain.
Just silence.
Just...peace.

It was the most precious moment in my entire life.
I cried as I hugged my mom and told her that it was time for him to go meet his mom and grammy and time for him to walk in heaven. He was ready to go and though it's hard for us to accept here because we love him and want to see him everyday, it is time to let go.

He was a truly remarkable soul. My hero. My role model. He lit up the room with his smile and that twinkle in his eye. He loved his family with all of his heart. My mom was like his daughter. Chris made his so proud by fighting for our country, he would well up with pride every time he was him. He loved his girls.
Danielle and me.
We were his princesses.
All night tonight all we could talk about were the amazing memories he gave us. He made life worth living, he made it beautiful. If everything were to go wrong from here on out it would be ok because he made the ride worth while. He was truly amazing, honest, sweet, loving and stubborn :]
I will always miss him, and I know he will always be with me.
When I walk down the isle
When I have my babies
When I loose other loved ones
When I go to meet him

He is ever present.

His impact on this Earth will never end.
My children and their children will hear about what an amazing person he was. I feel sorry for the people that weren't in his life, they missed out big time. It was a privilege having his love.

Thank you to my friends, family and co workers who have made this time more bearable. I am so very lucky to have you.

I love you grandpa.
You are the closest definition to perfect I could have ever found. You love unconditionally, you smile even when you are hurting, you can brighten anyone's day. You will always hold a huge piece of my heart.
Your Lizzy

him

For anyone who hasn't heard yet, my great grandpa went into the hospital last Thursday.

He had heart failure because of pneumonia that settled in his lungs. His swallowing reflex is weak and when thin liquids reach the back of his throat he doesn't have that signal sent to his brain that tells him to swallow. So he chokes, or it does down the wrong pipe, which is probably how he got the pneumonia in the first place. So they are thickening his liquids and now he really isn't eating. So to put it bluntly, he will get weaker and die. He told my mom that he doesn't think he will make it to his birthday (which is 13 days from today) and that he's is ready to go.

But I'm not.

Any of you who know my great grandpa know what an absolutely wonderful, interesting, stubborn, elaborate and adorable 95 year old he is. He will keep you occupied for hours with stories about the war or just lecturing you on life. He loves his family more than anything else in the world, especially his girls. He puts everybody's needs before himself, which drives us crazy. He is so stubborn though. Wonder where we get that from? hmmm.. and he loves to exaggerate; it's so adorable. I just can't imagine living in a world without him in it.

This has really consumed my life the last week, I think about him constantly when I'm not in Bolivar at his side. My mom is running crazy trying to cope, and even though we have the most supportive friends and family, this is going to be rough. He is my mom's REAL dad, not the man who is on the birth certificate. He is my REAL great grandpa, not the man who is just has the title out of obligation. He is the kind of person you get jealous for not being able to know him before you were born. The kind of person that will brighten your day when everything else sucks. He is the person that will call you on your crap but laugh it off 5 minutes later. He respects the military and treats women like princesses. He is old fashioned. He loves his ball games. His favorite things are Altoids, chocolate, and grape nuts. (Not together of course) Never tell him what to eat, because he's been alive almost 96 years and knows what to eat to live that long :]

I know I've had selfish thoughts lately.
I want him to see my in my wedding dress.
I want him to meet my children and hold them.
I want him to live.

I.

But I know that if God needs him then it's his time to go. And I have to learn to accept that. No matter how selfish my thoughts get I have to keep it clear in my mind that if he's ready then I need to make sure that his last few weeks here with me are the best of his life. I need to make him comfortable and love and hug on him as much as possible. A daily reminder.

Thank you to my friends who have been to supportive. I love you guys and you don't know how much I need you. I didn't know how much I need you.
Love,
Lauren Elizabeth
Grandpa's Lizzy

Adorable<3

This past weekend Shawn and I went out to Lamar for the city wide rumage sale. He has cousins out there and we stay with them and then get up really early (like black friday early) and shop for everything. We were looking for a washer, but we were unsuccessful :(

I did get a cute pair of shoes for 2 dollars and a spice rack for $1.25. I also got some really cute his and hers towel hangers. Way cute :] We got to spend some time with Olivia, our flower girl. We had a blast chasin after her all day, and by the end of the day I was dead set of having a little girl someday! (not that I wasn't already)

Fun Weekend=Fun pictures

Our First Home

So at the beginning of March Shawn and I signed a lease for our first home. I am currently living there but after the wedding Shawn will get to move in with me and it'll be official! I got so exited that I had every box unpacked after only two days of living there. It's an adorable 2 bed 1 bath unit in a 4-plex off of Mill Street. We are so excited to have our own place! It's brand new, never been lived in and it's really spacious. A perfect starter home<3

Family Pictures

At Christmas we finally got the whole family together to take some pictures. We just now got them back so I thought I'd post them for everyone to see!

Happy birthday Mariah!

On March 11th Mariah had her sweet 16 :]
Shawn, Mariah, Sheila nad Me all went out to Garbo's Pizzeria and then to Willard to see grandma Pauletta for ice cream!

home sweet home

Just wanted to give out a big
THANK YOU
To everyone who helped me move this past weekend.
It was a big job moving all of my stuff but I was amazed at how many people rushed to my side to help on such short notice. I thought it was going to be a night mare and even though it had its moments, as I was hanging up pictures on the freshly painted walls I had a moment where I literally had tears in my eyes because of how grateful I am for the people in my life. Signing papers Wednesday, packing Thursday, moving boxes Friday, moving furniture Saturday and unpacking all Saturday and Sunday night after church and work.... I have to say I am exhausted after a crazy weekend, but very relaxed to finally be in.
This is the perfect first home for Shawn and me. It's spacious, in a great town and it's never been lived in so it's in perfect condition. I love the way it looks, the way it's laid out and the homely feeling I get when I walk in the door. I promise to put up pictures soon, but I haven't got internet set up there yet so I can only get online at school and they don't have the port for my photo card. But I promise it's adorable :]
Thank you Missy for helping me pack up my entire kitchen and haul fifty thousand boxes 25 miles up the road.
Thank you Sheila and Mariah for staying at my house on Thursday night till 10 helping me pack up all of my crap lol, and then helping me Friday night unpack some of it and Saturday morning haul more of it. And Kevin for helping get that couch through the door, holly cow.
Thanks Mom and Dad for letting my use the Scrapnook trailer to carry most of the big furniture, and thanks dad for helping get it all in place.
Thank you Billy, Wade and Jack for carrying my way to heavy oak bed set and dining room table. Even though I thanked you with pizza you have no idea how incredibly grateful I am that you helped out.
Last but not least thank you Shawn for helping me unpack until the wee hours of the morning as we slowly made our duplex and home. I can't wait until you move in with me in June as my husband, there is so much to look forward to this year and I am so excited to see what this first home holds for us. I know one day a couple years from now, after we have built our dream home on the land by your parent's we will look back at our first place together on some great memories and be so thankful for the stepping stone God gave us on our way to our life together. We are truly blessed and he has led us to some amazing places.
So thanks again to everyone :]
I love you all and would be lost without you<3 You guys are my best mates!
lovelovelove
-lc-
ps: come see my new home sometime
103 Mill Street Willard Mo 65781